I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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