I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
