I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
