i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
My balls are so social today.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
