A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
