Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
