No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
