Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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