I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
