carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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