Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
