i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
