I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
4 words: hood of his car
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
