just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
