too bad you live with your parents still
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
