It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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