She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
