so that wasnt chicken after all
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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