Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
