So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
