Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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