Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
