Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
