i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
