He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
The Olympian is in my bed
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize