when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
