i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I am naked and annoyed.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
