I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
