There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
