his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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