My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Randomize
