You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
