uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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