woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
