i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Did I show you my penis last night?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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