He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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