woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
