Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
