Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
