so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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