it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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