Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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