dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
you have to choose: penises or morals?
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
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