I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
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