No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
