She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
My breasts were aching with rage.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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