so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize