I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize