I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
