Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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