yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I don't think brook has ever known best
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize
