in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
