im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
